I’m a strong woman

It all begins with an idea. It all began with her. I wanted to take the time to acknowledge how I felt for once. Take the time that I suddenly had on my hands and focus on how my mother made me strong, but also how I feel. Grief isn’t easy and it isn’t something that you can get over if you’re constantly distracting yourself or pushing it away.

They tell you not to make any drastic changes in your life for a year when you are grieving. While I don’t necessarily know if I agree with that sentiment, sometimes life makes even more changes for you.

Enter COVID-19.

Isolation—check. Routines—ruined. All my plans—indefinitely on hold. Don’t even get me started with dealing with an estate out of state during shutdowns.

But here’s the silver lining. I finally had time to focus on me. Stop distracting myself. Take up self care practices. Make new routines. Develop community in different ways that make me recognize when I can hang out again in person—who will I want to stay in my life? Most importantly I started making art for me again. Writing again. And pursuing something I believe in. That’s fucking strong.